


Yours, Always

by TurnUps



Category: Kingdom Hearts (Video Games)
Genre: Chain of Memories, Confessions, Fluff, Flustered, Letters, M/M, Realization, Writing to each other, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 08:54:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29115582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TurnUps/pseuds/TurnUps
Summary: The letter seemed to fall from the sky. It was rolled up, into a scroll, and landed right in front of Sora’s shoes. He stopped short, staring at it.Donald turned back, as soon as he realised Sora had fallen behind. He frowned. “What are you waiting for?”“There’s a –” Sora pointed to the letter, then up. There wasn’t even a cloud in the sky. Only paper, apparently. “It came from up there.”***King Mickey suggests that Riku writes letters to his tie to light. He chooses Sora. As they write back and forth, they start to untangle friendship from something deeper.
Relationships: Riku/Sora (Kingdom Hearts)
Comments: 13
Kudos: 73





	1. Chain of Memories

The letter seemed to fall from the sky. It was rolled up, into a scroll, and landed right in front of Sora’s shoes. He stopped short, staring at it.

Donald turned back, as soon as he realised Sora had fallen behind. He frowned. “What are you waiting for?”

“There’s a –” Sora pointed to the letter, then up. There wasn’t even a cloud in the sky. Only paper, apparently. “It came from up there.”

“That’s nonsense.”

“It _did_.” Sora nudged it with his shoe. When it didn’t turn into a heartless, or a monster, he knelt down, and picked it up. It was cold, as though it had been in a fridge.

“But why couldn’t it?” Goofy asked. “There’s plenty of weird things going on.”

Donald turned on him. “Letters don’t just come from nowhere.”

They continued bickering, as Sora turned it over in his hand. There was the King’s seal, on the ribbon, glinting silver in the bright sun. He tried to cover it with his thumb, but Jiminy saw from his shoulder, before he could hide it.

“It’s from the King!”

Donald and Goofy turned to him, a predatory glint in their eyes. They were ready to jump.

“I found it.” Sora held the letter to his chest, protectively.

“You tripped over it,” Donald squawked.

“It’s still mine.” He couldn’t hesitate – he slipped his finger under the seal, and freed it, unfurling the letter and –

He stared, heart thumping. Because it wasn’t from the King.

“Hands off!” He held it high – higher than Donald could reach, and walked backwards. “It’s not from the King – it’s from Riku!”

“Gwarsh, is that the boy that took the keyblade from you?” Goofy asked.

Sora’s stomach clenched. For a moment, it had felt like it had been before. When he and Riku were best friends, and never argued. (Not about anything that mattered, just petty squabbles.) For a moment, he had forgotten Hook’s ship, and Hollow Bastion.

“He closed the door to darkness,” Sora said. “From the other side.” And, at Donald and Goofy’s exchanged, confused glance. “He’s my _friend_. We’re going to find him. And the King.”

Another exchanged glance. This one with missed pity and understanding. But at least Sora was left alone to read. It was a slightly blocky, awkward script. One that was as familiar as his own –

_Sora,_

_Mickey said I should write this. I suppose you’d call him King Mickey. I try to call him Your Majesty. It feels weird. We’re both – alive. In the Realm of Darkness. It’s not as cold as it sounds, but there are heartless everywhere. Mickey’s good with a keyblade. It looks like yours._

_Mine is different._

_But, anyway, Mickey said to write to someone who would anchor me to the world of light. That it would help keep the darkness at bay. It looks like that’s going to be a never-ending battle. He said Kairi, since we worked so hard to get her heart back. So she must be important to me. But I couldn’t stop thinking about you, instead. It used to be just us, on the island. Do you remember that? I think it’s because of that, that I can’t write to her. She doesn’t understand, not everything. And I – wouldn’t know what to say to her – after –_

_You showed her our secret place, didn’t you?_

_I can’t be angry about something like that. Not after what I did. That’s also why I wanted to write to you, and couldn’t write to her. Because I’m sorry for – all of that. When the island fell into darkness, I woke up at Hollow Bastion, where we met again. Of course I wanted to find the both of you. Maleficent said she could help – but that you’d already moved on. I didn’t believe that, not at first – but, I thought – that I would be clever and double cross her. Pretend to go along with her, just to find you, find out what she was doing, and then stop it from the outside._

_Then I found you in Traverse Town. With – Donald and Goofy (? Is that his real name?) – and it felt like what she said could be true. I know you, but that was when she had her hold on me._

_Honestly, I wanted to be better than you. Controlling the heartless, and the darkness – I wanted to do it, because I knew you wouldn’t be able to. I thought that I was stronger. I guess I was just like Maleficent, in the end. We didn’t used to be rivals, did we? I don’t want to be, anymore._

_I was not manipulated. I chose to take every step._

_I don’t know if this will reach you, but I’m glad you and Kairi are safe. Be there for each other, and I’ll be back soon._

_Riku_

They were all still staring at him. Waiting to see what it said.

Sora thought that his cheeks were hot. He forced himself to smile – it came easily now – and said, “he’s okay! And so’s the King!”

Goofy beamed, and Donald did his best impression to seem unbothered, but it was clear he was excited. He called for them to keep walking, fighting a smile, though none of them knew where they were headed. There was nothing in the distance. Nothing put that same narrow, winding path.

They started again. Sora unfurled the letter and read it again. Someone to tie Riku to the light – his heart jumped and juddered at the thought. Okay. Riku was alive. And okay. In the realm of darkness, but he was strong. Strong enough to get out.

Sora would be there when he did. He wanted to be.

He read the letter half a dozen times before they stopped for the night. So that Riku’s words all but floated in front of him. Every loop of his letters, and haphazard slash across the ‘t’s memorized.

Donald almost burnt their eyebrows off by lighting the campfire. It was enough of a distraction for Sora to find paper and a pencil in their packs.

They ate; fruits they found on the road, and a chicken who’d gotten too close to them. (Too close to a duck for Sora’s liking, but Donald didn’t seem to care.) It was only when Donald and Goofy lay down for the night, that Sora began writing.

“I’m sure Donald and Goofy would have words to add,” a small voice said by his ear. Jiminy. Saying exactly what had been niggling at Sora’s stomach.

“I know,” Sora replied. Looked at the name he had put at the top of the page, and felt his chest ache. “If I get a reply, I’ll tell them and they can add on. It’s just –” That he wanted to be selfish. Just this once. Because it was – “It’s just that it’s Riku. I have so much I need to say. So much that – is just between us.”

His face felt warm, as he glanced over at his sleeping friends. Because they were friends, but what he had with Riku was different. He felt almost – shy – about it. So just this once, he would be selfish.

He wrote, in the soft light of the dying fire:

_Riku,_

_I’m so happy you’re alright! I’ve been thinking about you too – a lot. The Realm of Darkness…if anyone can make it out, you and the King can. Donald and Goofy (yes, that’s his real name) are so excited that he’s okay too. I can’t wait to see your keyblade. I never made it back to the Islands. But Kairi’s there. She’ll be safe, now that the keyholes are sealed._

_Of course I remember when it was just us. It felt like the whole island was ours. I thought about that, at Hollow Bastion, ~~after I’d taken…~~ The Beast’s roars reminded me of when we were in our secret place, and you told me the wind was a monster. You said we could beat anything, if we were together._

_I still believe that._

_Kairi found our secret place, rather than me showing it to her. But you’re right, I let her in. It must have been so hard for her – to be somewhere that wasn’t her home, with strange children, that I thought giving her just a small piece of ours would help. I should have checked with you though – you’re the Captain of the Raft, right?_

_You never let me finish, in Traverse Town. I was going to invite you with us. Donald and Goofy (yes, his real name), are great – but they’re not you, Riku. I could never think of exploring anywhere without you. I don’t know when we became rivals, but I don’t want to be, either. I prefer being friends._

_You did the right thing in the end. And if Maleficent ever comes back, we’ll kick her butt together._

_See you soon,_

_Sora_

He slept with the letter under his bedroll. The crinkle of the paper, as he turned his head, seemed to help him sleep.

And when he woke up in the morning, it was gone.

The letter looked like it was shining, in the blackness all around it.

Riku caught it, as it fell. For a moment, he couldn’t believe he was seeing colour. Everything here was dark. It was shadows upon shadows, and even the King was hard to separate from it all, sometimes.

Now here was a letter. And he knew, the moment he caught it, who it was from. No envelope, of course.

King Mickey was ahead of him. Now he stopped and turned back. Smiled. “I told you your letter would make it to him.”

“That wasn’t what I doubted,” Riku replied. He smiled, thumb drawing across the chicken scratch writing. Sora barely wrote, back home. “I didn’t think I’d get a reply.”

Partly because of what he’d done. He would understand if Sora didn’t want to talk to him. But mostly because he’d figured Sora would be busy. Or forget. At least take a day to write back. Unless it had been a day. It was so hard to tell here.

“Well,” Mickey continued. “You must have chosen the right person to write to.”

Riku’s stomach felt strange. Because it should have been Kairi. He’d wanted to save her heart. She was the one he and Sora both – in all of their games, she was the princess in the castle. But he had written to Sora. And it had been Sora’s letter that had made him feel, just for a moment, like he was back in the world of light.

Besides, Mickey said Sora was the right person to write to.

Mickey was watching him. Still smiling encouragingly. He had to do that a lot. Riku’s confidence wasn’t what it used to be.

He smiled back, and went to slip the letter into his pocket –

“I think here’s a good place to rest, for a bit.” Mickey stepped back towards him, and took a seat. He was not subtle.

But then, Riku thought, as he lowered himself to the ground, neither was Sora.

He took a look at the letter – and his heart stopped. “He didn’t make it back.”

“What?”

“He never made it back to the island. But he’s with Donald. And Goofy.”

“If he’s with those two –”

“Then I know he’ll be alright.” They’d done pretty well together so far, anyway.

Mickey nodded at him. Looking almost – proud? It was a strange thought. He nodded back, then turned his attention onto the letter. His heart pounded, slightly painfully, as he read. Which was silly, because it was only _Sora_. It must have been because he was beyond this, Riku reasoned. To hear from anyone, after being in here, was exciting.

There was not quite an ‘I forgive you,’ but Riku hadn’t hoped for that. The last sentence was more than he deserved. Spoke of moving on, rather than dwelling in what happened. And that was so very _him_. Kairi would have said that she forgave him, even if she did not mean it, because she’d think it would be what Riku wanted to hear. But maybe that wasn’t what he needed.

Captain of the Raft. That sounded so childish now. They had been stupid to think they could get anywhere on that thing. A pang of homesickness went through him. For the Destiny Islands they both remembered. For being small. For their secret place.

The only way to lessen that ache, was to write back.

_Sora,_

_Where are you? Do you know? If we were still rivals, I’d say race you back home. But we’re best friends, instead, so I’ll say be careful, instead. We’re doing alright. Mickey says we’ll find our way back to the light soon. I hope so. It’s cold here._

_I remember that too. You always believed anything I said to you. But that second part, that was probably true. I don’t think anything could win against the two of us. Not now that we both have keyblades, anyway._

_I also remember that you were scared of a lot. Like shooting stars hitting the island. And the Kraken. I said I’d protect you. Guess I haven’t been doing a very good job lately._

_And I guessed that you would invite me along, when we met in Traverse Town. I suppose that I didn’t like seeing you do so well on your own. We never did anything alone, and it was always you pestering me to go with you somewhere. I didn’t like the thought that you might not need me._

_The duck didn’t seem to like me very much, either._

_Don’t worry about Maleficent. She’s not going to want to take on the great hero again. (Which pales in comparison to Raft Captain, by the way.) I wonder how things would have turned out, if I came with you. Things would have been easier, I guess. Would I be able to fly, like you did? It looked fun. That puppet would have had an easier time too. How did he have a heart?_

_Guess I’ve still got a lot to learn, about that stuff. ~~Maybe you could teach~~_

_Kairi will be fine. On the island. We taught her how to take care of herself, on there. Though, she will shout at us both if we keep her waiting too long. (You more than me. She’ll worry about you more.)_

_I’ll see you soon. And we’ll go home together._

_Riku_

The second letter came in the same way. At least it landed on Sora’s head, as he was just waking up. That was good. It meant that he didn’t have to keep it away from Donald and Goofy – who were collecting berries for breakfast, and having a lay in, respectively.

He read it quickly, and his heart ached. So much that he had to breathe shallowly, to ease the pain. Riku was in the Realm of Darkness. It was cold. And he was full of regret. Must have been thinking of all the adventures they’d missed out on together. Real adventures this time, not just two children running down the beach, and pretending it was a snowy mountain, or the inside of a volcano.

Sora should have told him that he forgave him for it. That he had never stopped believing that Riku would be good, in the end. But he hadn’t been able to write that. Because he still remembered when Riku _looked_ like Riku, but had been cruel. Had set heartless on him, and tossed a wooden sword at his feet.

It was worse, because he had recognised those looks. The narrowing of his eyes and his smirk. For the last year or so, he’d looked at Sora like that more and more. Rivals. He’d been able to see the road Riku was walking, as if it was inevitable that he would turn on him. That he would hate Sora.

The fact that he didn’t. That he still remembered the island, and had still wanted to travel with him, was why his chest hurt so much. Riku was still there. His best friend.

Jiminy had climbed up onto his knee. Watching him.

“I missed him so much,” Sora whispered. And realised that his eyes were damp. “I _miss_ him, now.”

A tiny, green hand, patted him. “I’m sure he feels the same. Otherwise he wouldn’t have replied so quickly.”

Sora nodded. Wiped his eyes and took a breath to dislodge the heavy feeling. He read the letter again. Riku was alive – and worried about _him_. The thought made him smile.

“Are you going to tell the other two, this time?” Jiminy asked.

Sora paused. It was all so – private. Stuff between him and Riku, from a long ago time. They didn’t need to know. Definitely not about him being scared of shooting stars.

“Sort of,” he managed. “They can write back to the King, but they – they don’t need to know _everything_.”

Jiminy smiled at him. As though he could guess what he was thinking. Almost, in a similar way, to when Kairi was mentioned. They’d all look at him then. Tease him about his sweetheart.

Sora didn’t know how to say that he had barely thought about her since they’d set out again. It felt mean. But he knew where she was. She was safe.

He wrote back, as they ate breakfast, and managed to smear juice on the page, in several splatters.

_Riku,_

_I’d send you a blanket if I could. Or a jacket. That would be more practical, wouldn’t it? It never used to get cold at home. It’s cold at night, here, and I don’t like it. We don’t know where ‘here’ is. There’s just – a path. It’s very green all around, but there aren’t any trees. There’s just hills for miles. Its not the strangest world we’ve been to. There’s a castle in the distance, we’re headed to. You head there too, okay?_

_It was definitely you scared of the shooting stars, and definitely me saying I would protect you. But I haven’t done a great job of that, either. (Oh, and the kraken is real, by the way.) Do these letters help? I’ll keep writing to you, if they do._

_Of course I need you. I thought of you – everywhere we went, I wondered what you would think of every world we went to. Everyone we met. When we find each other again, I’ll take you everywhere, and introduce you to everyone. You’d like Leon, in Traverse Town. Don’t worry about Donald, he’s a grump, but he’s a big softy once you get to know him._

_I guess we won’t be able to, now. We’ll have to go back to the islands._

_Raft Captain is not better than Great Hero (which I’m not) – I would say they’re equal. And that Raft Captains can fly. All it takes is faith, trust and pixie dust. And I have faith for you, so that’s one part taken care of. (It is fun! It’s amazing!)_

_Pinocchio had a heart, because his father gave him one. When he was created, he treated Pinocchio like he had one, so of course he did. What I can’t understand is how the skeleton we met in Halloween Town had a heart? Where would he keep it?_

_Kairi might be more worried about me, but I’m more worried than her about you, I’m sure. Hurry and come back so that we can beat all the monsters together._

_See you_ really _soon, Riku!_

_Sora_

_(P.S That’s just berry juice.)_

_(P.P.S Donald and Goofy have attached a letter to the King.)_

Maybe the letter writing wasn’t a good idea, Riku thought. Because now he was constantly on edge, waiting for the next one. A glimmer of white against the nothingness. It wasn’t so much what the response said, as long as it came. That meant that Sora was alright. Alive. It meant that he was as well.

It was so hard to tell how long it had been. They fought, several skirmishes, until there had been enough light from King Mickey’s keyblade to keep the heartless wary of them. At least, for a bit.

Riku’s keyblade didn’t give off light.

They kept walking. As though there was a path in front of them, they simply couldn’t see. Every so often, they would stop, as though they’d come to a fork in the road, and wait for a moment. Often, they would decide on the same way. A slight bit to the left, or right. (Never backwards.) Sometimes, Riku felt differently to the King.

But he’d trust Riku. And follow him.

“The light in your heart is strong,” Mickey said. “It has to be, to have faced Ansem and won.”

It certainly didn’t feel like winning.

When the reply finally did come – he snatched it up eagerly. And his stomach lurched as he saw the stains on it, eyes frantically taking in the letters until he saw, at the bottom, that Sora was just as messy as he’d always been.

“Is Sora alright?” Mickey asked. He must have seen Riku’s expression.

He nodded. Separated the sleeves of paper from each other, and handed one over.

“This is for you.”

The King looked surprised. Then pleased, as he took it.

It was decided that they were in a good place to rest. It was not as though there was anywhere better. Or that they had any kind of camp to put up. So, he sat next to King Mickey, and read the letter. Slowly, and properly.

His heart raced. So fast, that it hurt. That Sora was lost, and not admitting it. That he needed Riku. Thought about him often – whenever he met someone new. Wanted to protect him right back. More than he wanted to protect _Kairi._ And he wished, more than ever, that he would have stayed where he was at Traverse Town. Said yes to the offer. Kept quiet about Maleficent, or at least said that he knew _something_ about her plan. That would have been enough.

He said as much to Mickey, when they were both done. Still riding on the wave of longing that came from words from a friend, before they could reply.

“I don’t think you’d be with him now, even if you did that,” Mickey said. He held his letter close to his own chest. “In the end, I think you’d always close the door from this side.”

That was something he hadn’t considered before. But now that he did, he knew it was true. Riku would always close the door to darkness from the other side. He’d never have let Sora do it.

But the rest still mattered, didn’t it? It must do, because Sora wouldn’t talk about it. Only what had happened at the end.

At least he didn’t hate him.

That gave him the courage to write back.

_Sora,_

_The letters help. A lot. It’s easy to lose track of things here, when everything’s so similar to everything else. A jacket would be great. I wish we’d thought to pack those before we left home. But the letters are enough. Where you are sounds nice. I’m sure you can use magic to keep yourself warm. You’ve picked up all sorts of tricks._

_I think I’d like to meet everyone you met, even if I do have a lot of apologising still to do. Not everyone’s like you. ~~No one is.~~ Even if we go back to the islands, I have a feeling we won’t stay there for long. The keyblade is always needed, even if the keyholes are sealed. And we’ll fly, together, one day. (I trust you, so that’s another part covered.) _

_Not sure that I get the heart thing, still. How can a puppet be alive? He was made with wood, by a man. I hope none of the carvings we did as kids would ever grow a heart. But a skeleton would still have a ribcage for his heart to be in, dummy. I’m surprised you didn’t need me there for that, too._

_Don’t worry about me. I’m doing fine. Take care of yourself first._

_I’ll aim for the castle, and meet you there. If we were still rivals, I would say that I’d race you there. But instead, I’ll be there as soon as I can. I can’t promise on anything, that it will be very soon, because I have nothing to give you._

_I hope its not too long now,_

_Riku_

Sora rolled his eyes, when he reached the bottom of the letter.

As if holding the promise they’d see each other again in their hearts wasn’t strong enough.


	2. 358/2 Days, and II

It was over. Another adventure. It mirrored the first, in a way. The adventure was done.

And Riku had been too late. At least, and it was a meagre silver lining, he hadn’t guaranteed he would. He’d missed Sora, completely. Now he was asleep – and who knew if he even remembered Riku?

So it had been better not to promise, after all.

Diz couldn’t tell Riku how long it would be before Sora woke up again. He just couldn’t make a guess. That meant a while. He didn’t want to tell Riku it would be a while.

He sat on the lowest floor of Castle Oblivion – that _stupid_ castle that Sora was so desperate to get to – facing the pods. He could see Sora inside, his lashes casting dark, spidery shadows over his cheeks. He looked paler than usual, in there. His skin almost white, mouth almost colourless. Even his hair didn’t look as dark.

But then, what would he think of Riku? Sat in a blindfold that made everything dark, and difficult to see clearly.

At least he could see well enough to write. It would be messy, but Sora had to know all that happened. Why Riku hadn’t been able to meet him after all, and what the plan was, when he woke up.

And, perhaps it would help. Just like when he was stuck in the realm of darkness, it could help Riku fight the darkness off. Sora had always been his beacon of light.

So Riku started to write to him. And he continued to write. Not everyday. But often.

*

Sora found the letters when he opened up his pack, to get lunch out. Immediately, he panicked, because it was actually Hayner’s backpack, on loan, and he didn’t want to even accidentally snoop into his stuff.

But then he saw his name. Saw his name, and realised he’d recognise that handwriting anywhere.

Riku. It was Riku. He must have been writing from wherever he was now. Just like before.

Donald and Goofy were busy with their own lunches. Pulling out cheese rolls, apples and oranges, and wrapped ice cream bars.

“They would want to know,” a little voice said on his shoulder. Jiminy. Guessing exactly what Sora was thinking.

“Only if he mentions the King,” Sora whispered, thumbing through the pages. There were a lot. He must have been writing all the time whilst he’d been asleep.

“You don’t really think that.” Jiminy was quiet. But he didn’t shout for their attention, and he didn’t stop Sora pulling the sheaf of letters out. Maybe he also understood that Sora wasn’t ready to share it with them quite yet. There was something about the letters – the fact that they were from Riku – that was very special. Private. They were only intended for him. From his best friend.

So he would tell them later. They had a very long train journey, ahead of them, after all.

_Sora,_

_I have to apologize to you. Again. I made it to the castle. It was where we came out of the Realm of Darkness from. The King and I were at the top and you three were at the bottom. I didn’t get to you in time._

_You probably won’t remember what happened there. A girl called Namin_ _é has had to send you to sleep, to put your memories back together. She was forced to alter them in the first place. I think you understood why. She told me as much as she could, about what you did at Castle Oblivion, so I’ve written it here._

It went on for a page and a half, Riku account. A strange, sickening feeling sat in Sora’s stomach as he read, as though he missed a step on the stairs, and was falling down. The feeling didn’t stop, as though his fall wasn’t stopping. He had done those things – the things Riku had written. But he had no memory of them, just like he said. Thinking about them made his mind feel fuzzy. It wasn’t even as though they were out of reach, or he felt a sense of déjà vu. It was just – nothing.

But it had happened. It must have, for him to wake up where he did. His memory had been – changed. By someone he didn’t even remember. Someone he must have trusted. Yet – now – now – now –

“I’ll write it down in the journal,” Jiminy murmured.

Sora kept reading. His heart started and juddered uncomfortably, like a racehorse. He fought to ignore it.

_There’s nothing we can do, except wait for Naminé to finish her work. I’ve been travelling to other worlds. Still trying to find a way to conquer the darkness in me. Its harder, without you._

_Its not so weird to see you always sleeping. That was how it was on the island, right? Whenever we’d work on the raft, you’d take a nap on the beach. Now, I just keep expecting you to wake up and laugh and apologize._

_I want to be there, when you wake up._

_Riku_

He kept flipping through the letters, in succession, because it was easier to keep reading, keep filling his mind with Riku’s words, than dwell on how he was feeling.

_Sora,_

_I’m still trying to understand the heart thing, like you do. I’ve been travelling to worlds with less humans. More – animals. The kind that talk, like Donald and Goofy. Although I try not to be spotted – Diz says its better that way, to preserve the world order – I’ve met a lot of ~~people creatures~~ friends, you’d call them. I don’t have your knack for making everyone adore you in five minutes, but I think I’m doing alright._

_You’re the same. Naminé says there’s a small complication in restoring your memories. We don’t know what that could be yet. It could be to do with when you lost your heart._

_Whatever it is, I’ll sort it. Keep slacking off, and I’ll see you soon,_

_Riku_

_Sora,_

_I met a man who’d turned into a bear. He chose to stay that way. Because he met a bear cub. They became brothers. And he knew he had to stay a bear to look after him, instead of transform back. He went back on everything he was taught – everything he believed – because his heart connected with that little bear’s._

_I’ve been thinking on transformations a lot. I’m not completely free of the darkness yet. If I’m not careful –_

_Naminé thinks she knows the problem with your memories. You released your heart from your body, so it stands to reason that you have a nobody. That’s the shell that’s left behind, when heartless are created. We don’t know if you have one for sure. But we’re looking. If there is – and that’s the reason you can’t –_

_The King is here. He’s a big help. He misses Donald and Goofy terribly. We talk about our memories with you to each other. It is meant to help, but it makes my chest ache._

_I also went to a forest. There were hunters there. For the deer. They were scared of me too. They must have thought I had a gun. I didn't chase them. I hid for a while, in the undergrowth, until they came back. And I just - watched. A deer and a rabbit and a skunk all came by. Together. Like they were friends. They played around for a bit, until the stag came. He was - incredible. Silent and graceful and - he looked so powerful. Like the was the King of the whole forest._

_You wouldn't have been able to stay still long enough, I bet._

_It's weird seeing you so still now. You usually stretch and wiggle and kick out in your sleep. You used to kick me straight out of the bed if we shared as kids. Do you remember that?_

_I miss you,_

_Riku_

_Sora,_

_You've faced some of Organisation 13 before. I don't know if they'll be there when you wake up. But we think they're the reason you're still asleep. They're up to something. ~~We~~ I'm going to find out what._

_If you do have a nobody, and he does get your memories, then I won't have a choice. I'll have to -_

_I'm still travelling. I try not to go to worlds you've been too. You said we'd go back together, so I'll wait. It's been a while now. Maybe a month. I don't want to count the days._

_But I have seen some familiar faces. The Beast (did he ever have a name?) from Hollow Bastion. He has a castle. Its tall and gothic. The kind of place that should have lightning behind it. There are rose bushes around the back. He’s not the strangest one there. The servants – they’re all furniture. It must be hard for them. And him. And the girl who lives there. Belle. She was one of the Princesses of Heart._

_I went to other worlds the Princesses of Heart lived in. More forests. The animals seemed afraid of me, in one, at first, but I told them not to be. Apologised, because I look –_

_They came right up then. Tried to lead me into a little cottage, and I mean a_ little _cottage. I’d have to stoop to get in the door. (I suppose that means you’d get in alright.) I told them I couldn’t. We’re not meant to interfere with the worlds, but I’m not really up to speaking to anyone right now. But I did look in the window. The house was little because dwarves lived there._

_There was another forest. In the world Maleficent came from. It seems a lot darker, even though there are just as many animals there, and they’re much friendlier. Maybe it was just my imagination. Knowing that she came from there._

_These worlds are okay. But it just feels like I’m killing time. ~~Waiting for you.~~ I wish you were here, so we could go to new worlds. Like we always talked about. Together._

_We were supposed to meet at Castle Oblivion. But I was late, that time._

_Sleep well,_

_Riku_

_Sora,_

_The Organisation is snooping around Agrabah. Wonderland too. It’s like some strange game. They’re trying not to be seen by anyone, and I’m trying not to be seen by them. Half of them keep their hoods up, so I can’t tell which is which._

_You’ve been to both of those places, right? I bet you liked Wonderland, huh? And I bet you loved getting sand in your shoes again in Agrabah. It would have reminded you of home._

_I thought about going back. Telling Kairi. But Naminé says her memories got confused too, and it might confuse her. I’m sorry._

_Diz – he’s the guy tracking the organisation with me. He knows the King. They’re friends. He can be trusted – he sent me back to the forest that Maleficent came from. There are fairies there. (They know Yen Sid, too. He trains keyblade wielders. And holds the Mark of Mastery Exam for them. Don’t worry, I’ll wait for you.) Anyway, they told me about what happened in their world. Maleficent wanted to destroy it there too. She controlled the Unverse at the time. (They don’t exist anymore.) She put a curse on the Princess – you must have met her too – when she was born, that she would prick her finger and die. One of the fairies changed it, so that she would only be sleeping. And it did happen. But there was a Prince. He kissed her. She woke up._

_They were very excited to tell me all of this. And how happy the Princess was now. Because it was all so romantic. I suppose it is._

_It made me – not angry – just –_

_Naminé’s making progress with your memories. She’s working hard. I’m keeping her company, whenever I can, but she likes to work alone. I guess we’re similar that way._

_Missing you,_

_Riku_

_Sora,_

_I went back to the forest, with the dwarves. There was a girl with them, this time. Very pretty, like Kairi. They were talking, and I didn’t mean to listen in, but the bluebirds were tugging at my hair, trying to get me to knock, and I just – heard it._

_She’d been asleep too. A poison apple, from a witch. A Prince found her, apparently they’d met before, and he kissed her. She woke up._

_All these Princesses are falling asleep, and there just always happens to be a Prince who can save them._

_Then there’s you. And I know its different, that you’re not under a curse, and you’re not a Princess, but I still wonder –_

_I mean – does it have to be a Prince? It’s not normally the boys asleep, so if it is him asleep, would the Princess work instead? ~~Or does it still have to be -? I’m not much of a Prince, anyhow.~~ It’s a silly idea, when we know how to make it right. With ‘witchcraft,’ not true love._

_Kissing used to seem like a really gross idea, didn’t it? But they aren’t much older than us, and I wonder –_

_Wake up soon, sleepyhead._

_Riku_

Kissing. The thought of kissing – Riku was right, it had seemed like a gross, silly thing to do for years. He remembered when they were all small, when (!!) and (!!) pressed their mouths against each others, behind the big tree on the island, just for a second. Comically puckered. He and Riku had pulled faces.

Riku had teased him about kissing Kairi one day. But he knew that Riku didn’t want to. His nose wrinkled, just slightly, when he said it, and it gave him away. Sora hadn’t known what to think. It still seemed bizarre. He supposed he’d thought – when the moment was right – that it would all just click into place. He’d understand.

Maybe he _would_ prefer to be asleep. So that he didn’t need to think or worry about it.

He’d pulled the letters closer to him, so that Jiminy slipped off of his shoulder and couldn’t see. It made him feel bad, especially as Jiminy tapped him with his umbrella, and told him it was important he recorded it all. For posterity.

But Riku was writing _–_ well, Sora’s face felt hot. Because he’d always thought that Riku looked like a Prince from a fairy tale. With his snowy-white hair and green-blue eyes, he just – _fit_. Especially when those eyes were gleaming, and he was smirking at Sora, offering him a hand up.

If Riku was like a Prince – his face burned – with the thought of kissing –

No. Waking up. Waking up to Riku bent over him, silver hair like a curtain to hide the both of them. Eyes like the sea at home, glinting at him. Laughing, because Sora had been slacking off again.

That wouldn’t be – awful.

It wouldn’t be the same as Kairi.

But he’d feel less embarrassed if it was Riku. He’d known him for so long. With Kairi, he always felt slightly awkward, slightly unsure. As if he had to include her, to make up for lost time, so that she didn’t feel bad.

If it was Riku, they'd probably laugh about it. Joke about how they had always been so close.

But they might not.

They might - have a moment- where they just - looked at each other - and - there would be an - oh - that was how it went. In these other worlds. He tried to imagine that, how that “oh, it’s you,” moment felt. Racing hearts, surely, and happy laughter. The feeling that everything that was missing just falling into place.

His chest did something strange. And he had been thinking of _Riku_. Not Kairi.

“Gwarsh, should we open a window?” Goofy asked.

They were all looking at him. He blinked back.

“I know who you’re thinking about.” Donald smiled, and they exchanged knowing looks.

But they didn’t. They thought Sora was thinking about Kairi. And he wasn’t. He forced himself to give a meek smile, to let them keep thinking that. He looked out of the window, trying to think of ice cubes and snow, to help him cool down. Trying not to think of Riku.

Yet, he wasn’t finished with the letters. And he had to read them all. They might hold a clue as to where Riku was now. They might be able to find him.

What if _he_ was asleep this time? Would Sora have to –

He turned back to the letters before he could finish the thought.

The next letter was strange. There were gaps. Just plain parchment instead of Riku’s neat handwriting. It wasn’t crossed out, like the other ones. It was simply as though he hadn’t written anything there at all.

He showed parts of this to Jiminy, explaining that the letters wouldn't be helpful towards the journal after all. That got Donald and Goofy's attention. They noticed the letters for the first time.

But they didn't try to snatch them away. They left him to it, after giving him a curious glance, playing I Spy, because good friends knew when others needed space.

Sora still tried to read what he could. His heart had crept steadily, all the way up to his mouth. It stayed there, heavy, as he took in what Riku had written.

_Sora,_

_Naminé has found a problem. There’s a – with your memories. And whilst – has your memories, you can’t wake up. Obviously, we don’t want to hurt –_

_But Sora, if it comes to you or – then I’ll do whatever I have to. Every time. You’re my best friend. And I can’t leave you like this._

_They’re Nobodies. Diz says they don’t have emotions. That they can’t feel. So – hopefully it won’t come to that._

_I will save you. I promise._

_Riku_

The following letters were similar. Missing words. Some whole sentences. But Sora could still get the gist. Riku had done whatever he’d had to in order to wake Sora up. That included hurting others. It gave him that strange, wobbly feeling as reading through what had happened at Castle Oblivion did. A feeling of unbalance. Because that wasn’t like Riku.

Or was it? He’d always been determined. Ready to do whatever he needed to get something done. It was different when it was tricking Wakka into loaning them tools for the raft. But when it was hurting someone – really hurting someone – it was different.

But he’d done it for Sora. To save Sora. Because it was the only way he could see to do that. And he couldn’t hate Riku for caring about him. He needed to tell him that.

He _had_ to find Riku.

There were a couple of pages that had been crumpled up. Scribbled over, so that they were hard to read. They were probably not meant to have been included, much less read. But if they held any clues, then – it was worth a try. There were a lot of 'miss yous.' Sora smoothed out one, bringing it close to his face to read it better.

_I know your name means sky but I've always thought you had eyes like the sea. Full of other worlds and possibilities. I keep - thinking about your eyes. I guess because they're always closed. I remember them being big and bright and - so ready for whatever you would find. We lost our home before Traverse Town. Our whole lives were turned upside down. Kairi was missing. But you still looked like you were full of wonder._

_Maybe I told a lie before. Maybe I was so angry with you because I was a little jealous. Or maybe -_

_I liked looking at you. And I knew I shouldn't._

_I don't think I can ask Mickey about this._

_But I don't know what to do with all these feelings in my chest. They seem to grow and tangle up and get confused the longer you're asleep._

_Come back soon._

_Riku_

Sora's cheeks felt warm. Boiling. So - this was what Riku thought. Of him.

_I think I understand how those Princes feel. Only – you’re not a Princess, of course._

_But I don’t think I could kiss Kairi. She’s a friend, but –_

_We’re friends now. Not rivals. And I like being your friend a lot, but I also –_

_I feel different, when I look at you._

_Maybe it’s because you’ve gotten taller. Less of a half-pint, but still not a full one. Your face has changed too. It’s less – roundish – in a good way. Less puppy fat. So you look – cool. Like a keyblade weilder._

_Almost. You still have awful fashion sense. And your clothes look a bit small now._

Sora tugged at his shorts, self-conscious. _Very_ self-conscious. Had he really changed that much? He hadn’t even done anything. Just slept.

_I miss your laugh too. You always used to laugh like there was nothing wrong, and nothing could ever be wrong. You used to laugh so much, too. And it was so hard not to laugh with you, when you filled the air with your brightness. Your smile was bright too. As bright as the sun. There you are. Sea, sky, sun._

_Sounds a lot like home._

_We’ll go back there. You and me. I don’t want to make it a promise, in case I can’t keep it._

_Yours,_

_Riku_

There was a warmth in Sora. Not the same hot, embarrassed feeling on his face. This was a good warmth, in his chest. In his heart. Maybe that was just how it felt to have good friends. Ones you wanted to see again.

Maybe it was something more. But he didn’t know enough about that to say for certain.

Well, whatever. He could figure it out when he was with Riku. He could ask about these letters, and what, exactly, they all meant.

He was smiling, he realised. Yeah, he’d have a few things to say to Riku.

The end of the letters was abrupt.

_Sora,_

_There's still a lot to fix. I won't be there, when you wake up. But you will. Wake up, I mean. I've made sure of it._

_Yours, always,_

_Riku_

That warm feeling grew into an ache. Riku hadn’t told him where he was. He’d gone off, without him. After all of those letters – he was just going to leave.

Fine, then. Sora would just have to find him. He’d keep the letters. Track Riku back down. And tell him –

He would figure out what to say later. When his cheeks weren’t burning, and his chest was not about to burst open.

But he would see Riku again. He would make sure of that.

*

So much happened so quickly. All in one day, he found out Riku’s appearance, which then went back to normal anyway, then they were all fighting, more fighting – and then the realm of darkness. It was a moment of peace, after a huge storm.

It could have been the right time to ask. But every part of Sora had been throbbing with a dull pain. That last fight with Xemnas had left him feeling exhausted, all the way through. So they’d sat – laid – on the beach, and tried to get their strength back. If it could ever come back in the Realm of Darkness.

And he’d just been about to ask – really – he’d been about to bring it up – when the bottled letter came through. Letters, again. This one had brought them both back to Destiny Islands.

Riku had said it was for him. He wasn’t sure. Maybe he was right. But Kairi had forgotten him once – it hadn’t been her fault, and still –

It could have been for either of them. Or both of them.

In the end, it was a few days after it all, when they were both sat on the beach. Kairi was with Selphie. They spent a lot of time together, now. That was good.

Riku had found a stick. He drew in the sand with it. Keys, crowns, the heartless symbol.

Before – before _everything_ – Sora would take a nap. Now, he’d been asleep too long. He felt like racing, or sword fighting, but that all seemed odd now. Something that children did. Once you’d been fighting for your life, it felt strange to do it on the safety of a beach, where the worst that could happen was a splinter.

So, he sat up in the sand, nudged Riku’s foot with his own, and forced the words out before he could think twice about it.

“I got your letters.”

There it was. He’d started. And he would have to finish.

“My – letters?” Riku looked up. There was a line between his eyes, as he frowned. “You mean from before Castle Oblivion?”

It was understandable, why he was finding it hard to remember. Castle Oblivion felt like a lifetime ago. Sora remembered that part clearly, then there was a muddled gap of half-memories. Things that he knew happened, and if he thought enough, could imagine, but couldn’t be sure were real.

He tried not to dwell on that.

“And after.”

Riku kept looking at him. Unmoving. But the twig snapped in the stand.

“You weren't supposed to,” he said, and Sora could hear just a flash of panic in his voice. “I didn't send those.”

The fact that Riku was flustered too made it easier for him to smile. “You shouldn't have put my name on them, then.”

Riku hid his face behind his hair – and it was so long now that it veiled most of his pink cheeks from view.

“They were just - just a way to talk to you,” he muttered. “Whilst you were...”

Sora shuffled closer. Just slightly. The sand slipped under his fingers like silk.

“Sleeping,” he finished. It was because his own heart was racing, that the rest slipped out. Because it was so easy to tease Riku. “Like a princess.”

Riku stiffened. All of him. When he spoke, his voice was a hoarse whisper. “How much - how much did you-?”

He felt slightly guilty then. There had been a lot on those letters. A lot of feeling that Riku was trying to figure out. But he wasn’t sorry that he’d read them. He knew. And it wasn’t like Riku was ever going to let it slip.

“Once I started, I couldn’t stop,” he said. “So I read –“

“All of them?” Riku sounded mortified.

His own cheeks felt warm, now. “As much as I could of the scribbled-on ones.”

“Sora!”

Riku stared at him from behind his silver hair, eyes wide, cheeks red.

Sora tried his best to look sheepish. “They had my name on.”

“They were private!” Riku pushed his shoulder.

“I had to. I had to find out where you’d gone.” Sora pushed him back. “You say they were your way of talking to me. It's only the same as telling me.”

“I could never _say_ those things!”

Exactly. Riku would never have told Sora how he felt.

“You wrote them.”

“You’re –“ Riku pounced on him, then. Grabbed a shoulder in either hand and threw his weight on top of him, so that Sora went sprawling in the sand. Stuck on his back. So that he was looking up into blue-green eyes. “You’re _awful!”_

“But you like my eyes.” Sora was smiling. He couldn’t help it. And he’d meant to be completely teasing, but it fizzled out the longer the more he spoke. Became earnest. “And my laugh. And my smile.”

“Shut up.” Riku’s grip tightened on his shoulders. Then he seemed to realise how soft Sora’s voice had gotten. How his hands were only on Riku’s wrists slightly; little finger just tracing the line of his gloves.

He stared down at him, the sun filtering through his hair so that half his face was in shadow, half in light. Beautiful, really. Riku was beautiful, and of course it didn’t matter if he looked like him or Ansem, but he was glad that it was _this_ Riku he was broaching this subject with.

“I wanted to write back,” he murmured. Their legs were tangled together, but neither of them moved. “But I couldn't think what to say.”

It had taken him so long to figure out what that warm feeling was. That it wasn’t the same as how he felt about Kairi. That it was more than friendship. That there were things about Riku he couldn’t stop thinking about. His smirk. The way his eyes glittered. How he was so _strong._

“You didn't have to say anything,” Riku said, hastily. He went to climb off of him, but Sora tightened his grip on Riku’s wrists.

Now that he was here, now that he knew how he felt, it seemed to easy. As though he couldn’t just say it.

“Maybe not.” Sora smiled, again. “Maybe all I should do I fall asleep on the beach.”

It took Riku a second. A long second. He blinked, then seemed to get the meaning, and his eyes went to Sora’s mouth. He bit his own lip. “Would you – well, will you –“

Sora couldn’t help a small laugh then. Only because Riku looked so unbelievably stunned at the possibility of his feelings being reciprocated, when surely it was obvious. He’d always thought the world of Riku.

“I think –“ His fingers skimmed past Riku’s hair – almost on his cheek. “I would like to be awake.”

It was Riku’s turn to smirk. Finally. “For once.”

And Sora’s turn to be flustered. “Hey.”

Riku was still chuckling as he leant closer. His hair really was like a veil. Sora’s heart thundered in his chest, seeming to sit on the end of his tongue. This was it. The thing he’d seen on so many worlds now.

Yet, Riku paused. So close that his breath was warm on Sora’s cheeks.

It was up to him then. He leant up, tilting his head just slightly to get the right angle.

They kissed.

It was a warm and bright thing. Like fireworks in the Summer. Or shooting stars. And when they fell away from each other, Sora’s lips tingled.

Riku kept staring at him. This time, like he was something amazing.

Well, he knew that feeling. Sora’s fingers tangled in Riku’s hair, watching the sun turn it into starlight.

Riku kissed him. They kissed each other. Still trying to figure out what to do when their mouths were together, but enjoying every moment.

Sora managed to sit back up. So they were side by side on the beach, the ocean coming in just enough to send a cold spray onto their toes. Just like the realm of darkness. Though know they faced each other, fingers touching in the sand.

Riku brushed Sora’s hair from his eyes. Brushed sand off his neck.

“I missed you,” Sora whispered. Didn’t really realise he’d said it. “So much.”

Riku raised an eyebrow. A smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth, and Sora couldn’t look away. “Now you know a little bit of how I felt without you.”

“It’s not a competition.” But if it was, Sora was sure he’d missed Riku more.

Riku only laughed. He nudged him with his shoulder, and Sora meant to nudge him back – but he found his head resting there, instead. He clutched Riku’s hand, staring out at the horizon line.

Their little world. After their big adventure. Everything had changed, but that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing.

“I’m glad you brought me back.”

Riku rested his head on top of Sora’s. Sighed.

“Always. I’ll always bring you back.”

“Forever yours.”

And Sora only knew he’d actually whispered it out loud, because Riku’s fingers tightened on his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (A/N): This chapter was not meant to get so big...but it was easier to have two parts than three for this.   
> Thanks for all of the support last week, and thanks in advance for kudos/comments this week <3 xx

**Author's Note:**

> (A/N): A few weeks back, I felt really unwell, and could only lie in bed. I'd been playing a lot of Melody of Memory and 358/2 days, and this was the fic I told myself to pass the time with. Idk if it's the kind of thing anyone else would want to read, lmao But I did enjoy writing the letters!  
> There is a second part to this that covers Riku's side of 358/2 days and a little bit of 2 where they finally meet face to face again.  
> Thanks in advance for all kudos/comments etc etc - I really do appreciate them all! <3 xx


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